I was instructed to do this as a small child, then I retained it later on in life. Its something simple and rather practical. I was told to keep my hands to myself - to not make physical contact with another person until I was invited to do so. Whether they were less or more intelligent than I, regardless of how attracted to them I was, or how certain I was that we were destined to be best friends or more, etc., etc., etc., - I did not touch or otherwise manipulate their personal space unless I was invited to do so. Even then…I'd wait.
I'd wait for our energies to sync up. I'd let us catch up to how comfortable we were in each other's space - to see how or if we could help each other and have fun. This, for me, is rather simple. Its simple because I postulate something very specific - that though our species has a plethora of commonalities - each person is a curious coagulation of those commonalities and each person is, at any given moment, manifesting incredibly random points along each spectrum of those commonalities…
SIMPLY PUT: People are different and like different things. I think those differences make life beautiful. I think this because I chose to befriend myself. Now to my point.
I don't give a flying-duck-fuck if you think I'm yummy, interesting, useful, or similar to gods-know-what/who. You are not allowed to touch me in any way, for any reason - until I indicate that you may. If you've taken a gunshot wound to the neck and can't, therefore, speak - then maybe you can touch me. Maybe.
The same goes for that yummy young little thing you're eyeing across the room - the one who looks far too naive to protest and call you on your bullshit - the one who hasn't been given scars, yet. I don't care how oppressed you felt or did not feel in high school, the workplace, home - or any other place. Grow a spine and don't encroach or manipulate. Its an act of cowardice.
Now - speaking directly to professional dommes who like to forget their manners --- I also don't care how typical you find anyone born with a penis. I'm not your client and regardless of how shiny your boots or how attractive you do or do not think you are - honey, don't fucking touch me - especially if you can't remember my name. I know some women who regard pro-domming as an act of Deep Healing and their clients as beloved friends. They're beautiful Humans renew my faith in humanity. Retain your dignity and don't shame them. If working in Kink has caused your Heart to shrink, then investigate a different source of income. Nobody likes a Grinch - even in lubey latex.
HERE'S THE WHY.
Do you know my past? Yes, my skin is soft, my face mostly wrinkle free, and my smile still accessible. My eyes still shine like the morning star and I still can find the grit to attempt enjoying our conversation without baggage. Don't mistake my joy for naiveté or my hope for ignorance. Being young doesn't save you from devastation. Catastrophe is an equal-opportunity bandit.
I smile because I had everything taken away from me and watched new blessings overflow my cup again. Scars fade with each evening tide and my Heart slowly melts away the chains of yesteryear. For every friend lost to heartbreak, ten new ones are just around the corner ready to celebrate the fact that I still breathe.
I laugh because though the ache of loss rippled through my body to the point where I couldn't experience pleasure without triggering horrifying memories ----- seasons change at exactly the moment when you think they forgot about it. Warm loving hands come your way after you let go of the cold hateful ones. Sometimes that last step is the hardest part; you must love your Joy more than you hate someone else.
I had the grit to open my hand to kindness because my spine was forged in the fires of the blackest Hell and I made the choice to Love my Self. Have you? It will change your Life.
So no, sweetheart - keep your hands --- and your tendrils --- to yourself. I didn't claw my way out of the depths and teach myself how to laugh again for you. I did it for me.
You must earn this - Not because I'm King Dommy Dom-Dom of the Fourth Reich, but because I'm Real and if you want to speak to me, you must look me in the eyes and tell me the truth. Top or bottom, I require this. I think you should, too.
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